What screws us up most

Google reports that it was Socrates who said, "What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it's supposed to be."  We carry in our minds pictures of how things in life are supposed to be.  We can recognize those mental pictures of things by all of the "shoulds" of which we speak.  It is that perfectionist part in us that has a long list of shoulds and gives strong voice to them.  It is difficult to accept that many things in life aren't as we think they should be.  In the face of how we think things are supposed to be, a healthy response is to discern a way to adjust, which implies an acceptance of how it really is. Another option is that we may choose to leave the situation.  Adjusting with acceptance or leaving, either is more healthy than constant complaining, criticizing and whining. Complaining, criticizing and whining usually won't change the situation but, those attitudes will change me.  They will create in me a bitter spirit and that's not healthy either for me or others.